Tiny Sheep Is Falling Down

The sheep was destined to be attractive; plain and comfortably watching on a little corner. As part of the scene where Jesus was supposed to be the center of attention, I noticed this sheep that has fallen asleep. Somehow, it didn’t have any choice but to be the different one: fallen and has no choice but to stay that way because it is just some Legos, in fact.

I am a fallen sheep, but I am not just some Legos. I can choose to stand up and focus on the center; or I can choose to remain fallen and focus on nothing. Of course, I am not one who will shout it out to the world that I don’t have any strength left anymore. But as they say, action speaks louder than words. I know you know that I’m not standing anymore. “I cannot fake it anymore” would’ve been appropriate if I was ignorant of the Way. But knowledge is all I’ve got now; I’ve given up the anointing. “I’m done” is more like it.

I don’t know what lies for tomorrow, I just want to lie down for a little bit and choose folly. I am not just a set of legos. I cry because I have done this. I cry because I am not victorious. I cry because I have failed people who love me dearly. But I carry on knowing this is wrong. Stop following me, for God’s sake.

These leaves caught my eyes. I like brown more than green. But I first loved green before brown. They say first love never dies. I hope so. I truly hope so. Because deep inside, I desire to come back to my first love.